A Guide to Separation Anxiety Disorder in Children

Separation anxiety disorder is a common childhood condition characterized by excessive fear or anxiety about being apart from home or loved ones. While it’s normal for young children to experience some anxiety when separated from their parents, separation anxiety disorder is more severe and can interfere with daily activities.

Understanding its symptoms, onset and treatment options can help parents and caregivers manage this condition effectively.

In this guide, we will explore what separation anxiety disorder is, identify its symptoms, discuss when it typically starts and provide strategies for dealing with it. We hope to equip you with knowledge and practical advice to support a child experiencing separation anxiety disorder.

What is Separation Anxiety?

Separation anxiety is a normal stage of development in young children. It typically occurs when a child becomes upset when a trusted caregiver leaves their sight. This emotional response is a healthy part of growing up, as it signifies the child’s attachment to their caregivers. However, when this anxiety becomes disproportionate and prolonged, it may indicate separation anxiety disorder.

Separation anxiety disorder defined

Separation anxiety disorder in children is diagnosed when a child experiences intense fear and distress about being away from home or loved ones for at least four weeks. This condition goes beyond typical developmental anxiety and can significantly impact a child’s ability to function at school and in social settings.

Symptoms of Separation Anxiety Disorder

Understanding separation anxiety disorder symptoms can help you identify whether a child may need professional help.

Common symptoms

  • Excessive Distress: An overwhelming fear that something terrible will happen to themselves or their caregivers when separated.
  • Reluctance to be Alone: A strong desire to remain close to a caregiver, even at home.
  • School Refusal: Refusal to attend school or participate in activities without a caregiver present.
  • Nightmares: Frequent nightmares about separation or harm coming to themselves or loved ones.
  • Physical Complaints: Headaches, stomachaches or other physical symptoms triggered by separation.
  • Clinginess: Intense attachment behaviors, such as following the caregiver around the house.

When does separation anxiety start?

Separation anxiety typically begins between the ages of six months and three years. However, separation anxiety disorder can occur in older children and even teenagers. Key periods when separation anxiety may escalate include starting preschool, transitioning to elementary school or experiencing significant changes at home such as a move or divorce.

How to Deal with Separation Anxiety

Addressing separation anxiety involves a combination of understanding, patience and strategic approaches. Here are some practical strategies for managing separation anxiety disorder in children:

Gradual exposure

Gradually introducing the child to short separations and gradually increasing the time apart can help them adjust. Start with brief absences and slowly extend the duration as the child becomes more comfortable.

Establishing routines

Consistent routines provide a sense of security for children. Establishing a predictable schedule can reduce anxiety by helping the child know what to expect each day.

Positive reinforcement

Rewarding the child for bravery and independence can encourage positive behaviors. Praise and small rewards for successful separations can reinforce their progress.

Communication

Openly discussing the child’s fears and anxieties can help them feel heard and understood. Encourage them to express their feelings and validate their emotions without judgment.

Professional help

If separation anxiety disorder significantly interferes with the child’s life, seeking professional help may be necessary. Therapists specializing in child anxiety can offer tailored interventions, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), to help the child develop coping mechanisms and reduce anxiety.

Separation Anxiety Treatment Options

There are several treatment options available for children with separation anxiety disorder. These options can be tailored to the child’s specific needs and severity of symptoms.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)

CBT is a widely used therapy for anxiety disorders. It involves identifying and changing negative thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to anxiety. CBT helps children develop healthier coping mechanisms and build confidence in managing their fears.

Family therapy

Family therapy involves working with the child and their family to improve communication and address issues contributing to the anxiety. Family members learn techniques to support the child’s progress and implement effective strategies at home.

Medication

In some cases, medication may be prescribed to help manage severe anxiety symptoms. Antidepressants or anti-anxiety medications may be considered, but they are typically used in conjunction with therapy and under the guidance of a healthcare professional.

School-based interventions

Collaboration with school personnel can be beneficial. School counselors and teachers can support the child’s progress by implementing strategies that reduce anxiety in the classroom and promote a supportive learning environment.

Get Help for Separation Anxiety 

Separation anxiety disorder in children is a manageable condition with the right understanding and approach. By recognizing the symptoms, knowing when it typically starts and implementing effective strategies, parents and caregivers can help children overcome their fears and thrive.

If separation anxiety disorder significantly impacts a child’s daily life, seeking professional help can provide valuable support and guidance. 

Lakeside Behavioral Health, located in Memphis, TN, can help your child or adolescent with their separation anxiety if it begins to impact their everyday life. Our outpatient and inpatient programs are designed to help your child take positive steps forward and take control of their mental health issues. Call us today at 901-371-5209 to get started or learn more about our admissions process.

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When you or a loved one is struggling with mental illness, addiction, or behavioral concerns, call us today at 901-377-4733. Licensed mental health professionals are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Lakeside has provided hope and healing since 1969.